You are dating a guy but constantly feeling you’re not good enough for him.
You don’t know why you feel that way; you wonder if he’s the cause or you are just being insecure.
So many ladies in healthy relationships battle self-doubt that might make them believe they are not good enough.
Feeling not good enough can make you clingy and insecure, ruining the relationship.
In this article, I will share the possible reasons why you feel you are not good enough for him and how to handle the situation.
If you are ready for the adventure, let’s get started.
Why Am I Not Good Enough For Him: 10 Things To Know
1. Your Past Is Haunting You
You would likely have low self-worth if you grew up in the wrong environment or with abusive parents.
Kids who had a rough childhood have issues with self-identity.
Feeling not good enough for him could result from the insecurities you grew up with as a child.
Your past relationships could also be why you feel that way.
If guys keep breaking up with you no matter what you do, you might start feeling not good enough.
2. He Compares You To His Exes
If you are dating a guy who constantly compares you with his exes, you will likely feel unworthy of him.
If he tells you all his exes have curves, and you are the only one that doesn’t, it might make you feel not good enough.
He could tell you his ex was hot, and they did amazing things together; such talk can affect your emotions.
3. You Have Low Self-Esteem
If you have low self-esteem, then you would sometimes feel you are not good enough for him.
Anything he does will confirm your thinking.
A chat with his female colleague and selfies with his female best friend will trigger a sense of inadequacy and low self-worth.
If you don’t want female friends around him or you monitor his every move, that’s a sign of low self-esteem.
4. He Mocks You With Your Mistakes
If your boyfriend keeps mocking you for your mistakes, you will feel bad about yourself.
Nobody can feel good under constant criticism.
If your man criticizes you for every little mistake, that would affect your self-confidence and make you reliant on him to make all the decisions.
If your boyfriend uses words like “you are too slow,” “you are not smart,” or “I am just managing you.”
Words like this can damage your self-worth and make you feel you are not good enough for him.
5. He Doesn’t Compliment You
Getting compliments from someone you love can help boost your self-esteem.
Everyone wants to be celebrated and hear sweet things about themselves.
If your boyfriend doesn’t compliment you, it will likely make you feel you are not good enough, especially when he compliments other ladies.
Your boyfriend complimenting you doesn’t end with him telling you how beautiful you are;
If he’s hiding the relationship from his friends and family, it could make you feel you are not good enough.
6. He Feels You Are Not In The Same League
He may feel he’s not in your league and deserves to be with someone better than you.
You can do nothing if that’s his thinking.
Many women go on the path of trying to prove they are enough when in reality, there’s nothing to prove.
If a guy thinks he’s outside your league, you will easily notice his lack of commitment.
7. You Are Not Compatible
If you are incompatible, constant fights in the relationship will make you feel bad about yourself.
When two people are compatible, you only have to do a little to keep the relationship going,
But when you are not, it drains you emotionally and makes you feel you are not good enough for him.
8. His Words And Actions Intimidate You
Your boyfriend could be saying words that make you feel inadequate.
He could say you are fat and needs to lose weight, or you could not get a good job because you are not smart.
Words like that affect your self-confidence, especially when he’s smart, and people admire his intelligence.
Sometimes he might not be the one intimidating you, but his natural abilities can make you feel you are not good enough for him.
He might be very smart, and you feel you can’t match his intelligence.
9. Negative Self-Image
You may have a negative self-image about yourself.
You might feel your boyfriend is too good and you don’t deserve him, or another woman could steal him from you.
Maybe you are fat or not as educated as your boyfriend.
He could have a good job, and you are struggling with your finances and wondering why he would love someone like you.
Such a negative self-image could collapse your relationship with time.
How To Deal With Not Being Good Enough For Him
10. Find Out Why You Feel That Way
The first action is to discover why you are not feeling good enough.
Is your boyfriend the cause through his words or action, or it’s you?
Find out what makes you feel that way, and then take the next action below:
11. Talk To Him About It
My girlfriend once did this in the early stages of our relationship.
I met her sad one day and asked her what the issue was. She hesitated before saying she sometimes feels she’s not good enough for me.
I laughed and told her she was more than enough for me.
Hearing those words gave her self-esteem a boost.
Sit with your man and tell him how you feel and your inner battles.
His response will help you decide if the relationship is worth it.
12. Seek Professional Help
It’s not easy to handle low self-esteem issues on your own.
You might need professional help. That’s why I recommend you sign up for therapy.
Some people believe they can get over self-esteem without anyone’s help that’s often not the case.
Talking to a professional about how you feel can help you uncover what you weren’t aware of before.
13. Practice Self-Love
No matter how nice your boyfriend is, nothing can replace self-love.
You have to learn to love and value yourself.
Get books and watch movies on how to practice self-love.
If your man is your only source of happiness, he can easily take advantage of it and get whatever he wants.
If you don’t have self-love, you would hardly say “NO” to the request of your guy because you won’t want him to be unhappy and leave you.
In such a case, you are willing to do anything to please him, even to your detriment.
Practice self-love. You shouldn’t try to love someone if you don’t love yourself first.
Frequently Asked Question
Why Do I Feel Like I Am Not Good Enough For Him?
There are a few reasons why you might feel that way, some of them are listed below:
Your past is haunting you
You have low self-esteem
You feel your man is too good for you
He intimidates you with his natural abilities
You had a negative childhood
He keeps mocking you with his mistakes
What Does It Mean When You Don’t Feel Good Enough For Him?
If you are feeling not good enough for him, it could mean the following:
You have issues with your self-worth
You are feeling intimidated by his personality
You’ve allowed your circumstances to define your self-esteem
You are not practicing self-love
How Can I Be Good Enough For Him?
You don’t need to. If your boyfriend loves you, he will accept you as you are.
No need to change yourself in the name of love and become someone you are not.
You don’t have to “prove” you are good enough for him.
If he doesn’t see your value, he’s not worth it.
Most women fall into the hole of trying to prove they are good enough.
Some change so much for the guy that they no longer know who they are. Don’t be one of them.