dating a guy with low self esteem

11 Exciting Tips for Dating A Man With Low Self-Esteem

So, you’ve met a great guy. He’s smart and funny, and he seems to like you.

The only catch? He has low self-esteem.

You’re not quite sure why, but you’re drawn to him, and you want to help him feel better about himself.

You might be asking yourself, “Why would I want to date someone who doesn’t think very highly of himself?”

There are a few reasons. First of all, it’s rewarding to be able to help someone feel better about themselves.

You can be the person who makes them feel loved and supported, which can be powerful. Secondly, dating someone with low self-esteem can be a lot of work.

But it can also be really rewarding to see them gradually start to build up their confidence.

If you’re up for the challenge, read on for our tips for dating a man with low self-esteem.

5 Top Tips for Dating A Man With Low Self Esteem

1. Proceed With Caution He May Not Be Ready For A Relationship

Dating A Man With Low Self-Esteem

Just because a guy has low self-esteem doesn’t mean he isn’t ready for a relationship.

However, it’s important to proceed with caution. Some guys with low self-esteem are perfectly content being single.

They may not be ready for the commitment that comes with a relationship.

Other guys may be so insecure that they will constantly put you down or focus more on their flaws than the good things about their relationship.

If you’re dating a man with low self-esteem, it’s important to make sure that he is ready and willing to commit to you before you dive in.

2. Do Not Take On the Role of His Therapist

It’s important not to take on the role of his therapist.

Even though you may want to help and support him, it’s best for you if you don’t try to be his saviour.

You’ll only get frustrated, and he’ll feel even more helpless.

The best thing you can do is be there for him and provide a listening ear when he needs it.

Offer emotional support, but don’t push him too hard or try to fix him. He’ll come around in his own time.

3. Encourage and Compliment Him, but Do Not Try To Change Him

One of the best things you can do when dating a man with low self-esteem is to encourage and compliment them.

Build him up and make him feel good. However, it’s important not to try to change him.

They need to learn to accept themselves for who they are, and you can help them get there, but don’t push them too hard.

Just be there for them, listen to them, and love them.

4. Be Patient

If you’re dating a man with low self-esteem, be patient.

He’s probably not used to feeling good about himself, so it may take time to come out of his shell.

Don’t expect him to connect easily with others- he may need some time to warm up to people and feel comfortable in social situations.

Just be there for him and let him know that you’re not going anywhere.

5. Accept Him for Who He Is

No one is perfect, and that goes for the man in your life.

If your man has low self-esteem, accept him for who he is.

Don’t put him down. Accepting him will only help to build his confidence.

Let your man know that you love him just the way he is and he doesn’t need to do anything to impress you.

6. Avoid Criticism

signs of low self esteem in a man

Criticism is the number one way to make a man with low self-esteem feels even worse about himself.

It’s like pouring salt on a wound. If you want to help your guy feel better, focus on offering compliments and positive reinforcement instead.

Let him know that you think he’s worth it and appreciates him. Which would make him feel loved and supported.

7. Stand Up For Him

It can be difficult to date someone with low self-esteem, but it’s important to remember that they still deserve your love and affection.

One way to support your partner is to stand up for them when they’re not around.

Speak positively about them to your friends and family, and defend them when someone is rude or critical.

Show them that you’re in it for the long haul and proud to be with them.

Plus, it can be reassuring to know that they have your loyalty and support.

8. Be Prepared To Deal With His Insecurities

Dating a man with low self-esteem can be challenging, but it’s worth it.

He may be insecure and have a lot of doubts about himself, but that doesn’t mean he doesn’t have a good heart.

If you’re up for the challenge, here are a few things you can do to help him feel more confident:

Be understanding and supportive. Let your man know that you love him.

Please don’t make fun of his insecurities or dismiss them.

Encourage him to do things that make him feel good about himself, like exercise, spending time with friends, or simply relaxing.

Be upbeat around him, even when he’s feeling down.

Try not to take his insecurity personally. It’s not your fault, and you can’t change how he feels.

9. Let Him Know That you’re Not Going Anywhere.

It can be tough dating a man with low self esteem

They may often feel like they’re not good enough or doubt themselves constantly.

A key to helping your partner feel loved and supported is to let them know that you’re not going anywhere.

Reassure your guy that you love him and appreciate him and that he deserves your love and support, no matter what.

10. Be Honest With Him

It’s important; to be honest with the man you’re dating, especially if he has low self-esteem.

Trying to “fix” him or pretending that everything is okay when it’s not will only lead to resentment and frustration on both of your parts.

Tell him straight out if you’re not happy with something he’s doing.

Be direct and let him know what’s wrong. He’ll appreciate your honesty, making the relationship more genuine and authentic.

11. Let Him Go If He Is Not Ready To Work On Himself

breaking up with a man with low self-esteem

If you’re dating someone with low self-esteem, it’s important to be supportive.

However, you can only do so much. If your guy is not ready or willing to work on himself, it might be time to let him go.

Remember, you deserve someone who loves and respects you. You don’t need a guy who will constantly make you feel like you are not doing enough to make him happy.

Frequently Asked Questions

Why Do Guys With Low Self-Esteem Struggle To Date?

Guys with low self-esteem often have a harder time dating because they don’t feel confident.

They may be worried that they’re not good enough for their date, or they won’t be able to live up to her expectations.

Such can lead to insecurity and self-doubt, which can be off-putting for potential dates.

What Are The Signs Of A Man With Low Self-Esteem?

Signs that a guy might have low self-esteem can be tricky since many guys try to put on a brave face and project an image of confidence.

However, a few telltale signs can give you a clue.

Guys with low self-esteem often have a poor self-image and maybe shy or withdrawn.

They may also be insecure or hypersensitive to criticism.

Another sign is the excessive need for approval or attention. If your guy is constantly seeking validation from you or others, it’s a sign that he has low self-esteem.

How Can You Help A Guy With Low Self-Esteem Feel More Confident?

First and foremost, it’s important to be supportive.

Let him know that you think he’s great and appreciates him.

Compliment him often, but make sure your compliments are genuine and honest.

Genuine compliments are uplifting and make the person feel good. Please resist the urge to put him down or minimize his accomplishments.

We all feel good when we’re around someone who makes us feel valued and appreciated.

Another way to help a guy with low self-esteem feel more confident is to give him specific compliments.

For example, “You have a really great sense of humor” or “I really appreciate how hard you work.”

These types of compliments help a guy feel seen and acknowledged.

Lastly, don’t be afraid to let him take the lead sometimes.

A guy with low self-esteem may need a little more guidance when dating and feel more comfortable if you take the lead sometimes.

What Should You Avoid Doing When Dating A Man With Low Self-Esteem?

When it comes to dating a man with low self-esteem, it’s important to be mindful of your words and actions. Here are four things you should avoid doing:

Don’t criticize or judge him

Please don’t play games or lead him on

Please don’t make fun of him or put him down

Don’t ignore his feelings or blow him off

How Can You Tell If A Guy With Low Self-Esteem Is Right For You?

Sometimes, it can be difficult to determine whether or not dating a guy with low self-esteem is right for you.

After all, you want to make sure you’re not breaking his heart. Here are a few signs that he might be worth your time:

He’s humble and doesn’t always put himself first.

He has a good sense of humour and can always laugh at himself.

He’s insecure, but he’s also open to feedback and criticism.

He’s willing to put in the effort to make things work, even when he’s feeling down about himself.

If you can relate to these qualities, you’re dating the right guy. Just make sure you’re both on the same page and ready to support him through his low moments.

Why Do I Attract Guys with Low Self-Esteem

Here are a few reasons why you attract guys with low self-esteem

You Have A Savior Mindset: if you have a mindset to fix or save a guy by giving him love and affection, then you would most likely attract a guy with low self-esteem

Such guys have a sad story to share that automatically activates the emotional side of you and makes you want to rescue them from their predicament by loving them.

In a nutshell, you pity them.

But the truth is you can’t fix or change anybody; you would only end up disappointed.

To overcome such a mindset, you have to define what love is to you, have a list of qualities you want in your ideal man in terms of character.

You Have Self-Esteem Issues: most ladies with self-esteem attract men like them.

The truth is in a relationship; you attract who you are, not who you want.

If you are constantly attracting only men with low self-esteem, it’s time to reevaluate yourself and check why.

You Are A Victim Of Parental Abuse: most women who are victims of parental abuse end up dating men with low self-esteem.

The reason is that such women have a mindset of trying to fix their partner.

If you are a victim of parental abuse, it’s important to seek professional help to break free from attracting the wrong men.

Can Men With Low Self Esteem Love?

Yes, they can. But such a relationship is filled with insecurity and jealousy that ultimately chokes the relationship’s life or makes the relationship toxic.

Men with low self-esteem can love you but find it hard to love themselves.

When a guy has low self-esteem, he becomes clingy, suffocating you emotionally.


Dating a guy with low self-esteem can be a daunting task, but it is not impossible.

By following these 11 tips, you can make the relationship work while helping him build up his self-esteem. Remember, it is important to be patient and to love him for who he is.

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