Most ladies want to know if they are dating a narcissist guy,
Many of them are unsure even though they’ve noticed certain narcissistic behaviors in their boyfriend.
The truth is it’s not always easy to accept your guy is narcissistic,
Especially when you are in love.
You can easily get blinded by the illusion that he will change soon.
You might have noticed some weird behaviors of your boyfriend that you don’t even know is narcissistic.
After all, very few women even bothered to look up the word narcissism in a dictionary or online,
So they might not even know their boyfriend is one.
The sad part is that most guys don’t even know they have a narcissistic personality disorder.
Many of them display an attitude that they feel is right without caring how it affects others.
This article will share eleven sure signs of a narcissist boyfriend and how to handle the situation.
Who Is A Narcissist?
A narcissist is someone with a narcissistic personality disorder (NPD).
It’s a personality disorder that makes somebody have an exaggerated opinion of themselves.
This causes them to have an obsession with praise and admiration from others.
It also makes them defensive against criticism since it hurts their ego.
How Does A Narcissistic Act In A Relationship?
Narcissistic individuals generally have a superiority mindset; this is not to be mistaken as high self-esteem,
Psychologists have discovered that narcissistic generally have low self-esteem.
When they are in a relationship with you, they try to put you down or abuse you to feel good about them.
Their superiority mindset makes it difficult for you to correct them or for them to accept they are wrong.
In their eyes, they are better than you and just “managing” you because they have so many other women craving their attention.
If you’ve been asking yourself,
“how do I know if my boyfriend is a narcissist”?
Then the signs listed below would give you the needed insight to know if your boyfriend is one of them.
11 Sure Signs of a Narcissist Boyfriend
1. He’s Too Concerned about His Reputation & Appearance
Dating a guy who feels he’s the most handsome guy in the world and doing you a favor by dating you is a narcissistic red flag.
They are generally too concerned about their appearance and would do anything to get praise and admiration from everyone around them.
A narcissist cares so much about how the world sees him and can spend a lot of time worrying about how strangers perceive him.
When you go on an outing with him and take your girlfriend along,
He can treat your friend like a queen and completely ignore you like you mean nothing.
That often confuses many ladies who can’t understand why their boyfriend would treat them like trash and treats their friend nicely.
A narcissist guy generally tends to be “love and caring” initially and would go to any length to win your heart.
A term psychologists call “love bombing.”
Psychologists warn that such behaviors shouldn’t be mistaken for empathy and care.
But in reality, a narcissist is testing the waters if you would be suitable for his narcissistic behaviors.
If you are dating a guy who used to act so caring and desperate to be with you, and now he’s abusive, he’s most likely a narcissist.
2. Everything Is All About Him
If you are dating a guy and everything is about him, beware.
Situations such as he wants you to always call him without him calling you, or he always talks about himself.
It’s always about his job, his career, his business.
If you find yourself in a relationship where you don’t exist, you are probably dating a narcissist.
When you are dating a narcissist guy, you are most likely to become resentful because your emotional needs are not met.
In simple terms, when your boyfriend is a narcissist, you don’t matter in the relationship.
3. He Has Excessive Need for Admiration
Since narcissist guys have an excessive need for praise and admiration,
They would go to any length to receive respect from others.
They can give money they don’t have in order to feel good about themselves.
They can make decisions that can be detrimental to you all because they want praise.
They can hurt your feelings and put you down to get praise and admiration from others.
4. He’s Manipulative and Emotionally Abusive
If you are dating a guy who finds every opportunity to put you down and make you feel less of yourself,
You may be dating a narcissist.
Narcissists are known to be manipulative and verbally abusive; they talk down on you to feel better about themselves.
They criticize every good thing you do,
Making you feel like you are of no good.
All of your good intentions are misjudged, followed by verbal and emotional abuse.
I have a female friend whose boyfriend sometimes body shames her.
He tells her, “you are too fat” or “you are occupying space.”
If you have a guy who puts you down because of your job, body, size, or past mistakes, you are most likely dating a narcissist.
The goal of the narcissist boyfriend is to make you have low self-esteem,
Which would make you stay long with him and endure his abuse.
5. He Doesn’t Care How You Feel
Most narcissists don’t care about you; they only care about themselves.
They would do whatever makes them feel important, even to your detriment.
Whether you are happy or sad or your day at work was terrible, it’s none of his business.
All he wants to do is talk about himself and his challenges.
A narcissist boyfriend would cheat and lie without thinking about its effect on you.
If you are dating a guy who doesn’t care about you, no matter your sacrifice, that’s a sign he’s narcissistic.
Narcissists panic when you announce you are frustrated and want to break up.
6. He Has Entitlement Mentality
Does your boyfriend feel he’s entitled to anything that has to do with you? That’s narcissistic behavior.
Narcissists get angry when you do anything for yourself.
They get angry when you buy a new phone or rent a new apartment instead of helping them with their financial challenges.
They make you feel it’s your responsibility to take care of them and make them happy without caring about your happiness.
They are most likely to get angry when you refuse them anything; narcissists have the “I own you” mentality.
And as such, they believe they can get anything they want.
7. He’s Extremely Jealous
A narcissist boyfriend would easily accuse you of cheating, even when, in reality, they are the one cheating.
Narcissist guys have an insecure view of who they are, and tend to be suspicious of everything you do.
They also tend to track your phone and read through your messages,
And would accuse you of cheating the moment they see you discussing with another guy.
They feel everyone around them is envious of their “looks” or “success” or anything that makes them feel important.
A narcissist guy is most likely to create enemies around those who live with him and want you to do the same.
8. He’s arrogant and Naughty
In case you haven’t noticed, narcissists have pride which makes them arrogant,
When things don’t go their way or they don’t get the admiration they desperately want.
When a narcissist boyfriend is angry with you,
He becomes arrogant and tries to do all he can to hurt you emotionally.
Narcissists are control freaks and would exhibit nasty behavior to prove they are in charge.
E.g., he tells you what to wear or not wear, where to go, and who can be your friends.
They like to isolate you from anyone that would give you meaningful advice that’s not to their advantage.
9. He Has Few Friends
Most narcissists have very few friends.
Their desire for superiority makes their friends avoid them.
They often want to feel more intelligent than their friends and would take advantage of any opportunity that makes them look superior.
For reasons such as this, they have very few friends as most of their friends cut them off after a while.
10. He’s Never Wrong
Try correcting a narcissist boyfriend and you will find out it’s a complete waste of time.
Getting a narcissist to accept his mistakes is like taking a needle through the eyes of a camel.
It’s almost impossible.
He’s never wrong and doesn’t see why he should apologize for anything.
Narcissists don’t see disagreement as a disagreement; they see it as teaching you what you don’t know.
They quickly bring their “vast” knowledge to display because they believe they are more intelligent than you, so you can’t correct them.
11. He Lacks Human Empathy
Ladies often ask me a question which is,
“Does a narcissist know he’s hurting you.”
Psychologists have said that narcissists lack human empathy,
And as such, they are cold and would hardly feel sorry for you even if you are in a life-threatening situation.
A narcissist boyfriend can complain you didn’t visit him even though you are not feeling well.
Such a guy would treat you lousy no matter your situation or stress because he lacks empathy.
Narcissists are generally hard-hearted and can see you in obvious pain and ignore you.
Will My Narcissist Boyfriend Ever Change?
I get this question from ladies who want their relationship to work because they’ve invested so much time and energy.
Short answer: they can change but hardly do.
According to Healthline, narcissists hardly change.
They can temporarily pretend to change if they sense they will lose you,
But it’s still another manipulative strategy to keep you in the relationship.
How To Deal With A Narcissist Boyfriend?
There are a few tips for dealing with a narcissistic boyfriend.
First, you have to accept him for who he is; after all, you can do nothing to change his behavior.
Next, make sure you speak to him and recommend he seeks the help of a licensed mental health professional.
If he refuses to admit he has a problem that needs fixing,
It’s time to let him go before he destroys your self-esteem and wrecks your self-worth.
How Long Does It Take To Recover From Narcissistic Relationship?
There is no definite answer to the question,
It depends on several factors such as the duration of the abusive relationship and the intensity of the damage done (how much you allowed him to hurt you)
It also depends on if you want to heal without help or seek the use of a licensed psychologist.
In general, healing from a narcissistic relationship can take a few months to a few years.
How Do You Move On After A Narcissistic Relationship?
It’s never easy to walk away from a narcissistic relationship,
Especially when you’ve been with him for years and believe he will change.
But it gets to a time where you have to let him go; the following tips would help you move on from the relationship.
First, congratulate yourself for having the courage to let go, remind yourself that you deserve better, and sincerely you do.
Then be careful not to keep in constant communication with your narcissist boyfriend,
Because he would want to stay in touch and try to get back into your life.
Lastly, seek professional help in other to rebuild your self-esteem.
A narcissistic personality disorder is a mental condition that you can work on,
When the narcissist admits he has a problem and is committed to making a radical change in their life.
Psychologists recommend talk therapy to get the narcissist guy to be aware of his mental health and urge him to commit sincerely to an improved lifestyle.