In a romantic relationship, it’s common to hurt each other even if you didn’t plan to.
You and your boyfriend are from different backgrounds, and your ideologies about life might be different, which can cause fights in the relationship.
In this article, I will share the possible reasons why your boyfriend hurt you emotionally and what it could mean for the relationship.
If you are ready, let’s get started
My Boyfriend Hurt Me Emotionally: Why He Acts That Way
1. He’s Not Aware
Maybe he’s unaware he said or did something that hurt you.
Most women want a magician as a boyfriend who would know they are hurt without telling him.
Unfortunately, it doesn’t work like that, maybe he said or did something, but he didn’t expect it would hurt you.
I once dated a girl who wasn’t happy that I didn’t visit her often, but she never told me about it.
She just kept it to herself, started cheating on me and accused me of being the cause of it.
2. You’ve Been Silent About It
If your boyfriend has been hurting you constantly, It’s a sign you kept quiet about it.
Most men take your silence as acceptance, giving them the confidence to continue in the act.
He will continue to hurt you if you don’t address it.
Take cheating, for instance. It will repeat itself if you don’t set boundaries and take drastic measures against such acts.
Ask yourself have been silent about his actions that hurt you. If yes, he would keep hurting you emotionally.
3. He’s Insecure
An insecure guy would try to hurt you emotionally so that you stay with him.
If your boyfriend has been trying to put you down or treats you like trash, there’s a high chance he’s insecure and wants to attack your self-worth to keep you with him.
If he makes you feel worthless or not good enough, that might be what he feels within himself, especially when you are more successful than him.
4. He’s Tired Of The Relationship
When a guy is tired of the relationship and doesn’t know how to tell you, he deliberately starts to hurt you emotionally.
He tells you things that would hurt you, mocks you with your secrets, ghosts you and could even cheat on you without hiding it.
If your boyfriend has lost all sense of value and respect for you and doesn’t mind if you leave, that’s proof he’s tired of the relationship.
It’s why he keeps hurting you; when a guy is tired of you, he keeps playing with your feelings, making jokes about you to his friends and treating you like you don’t matter.
5. He’s Trying To Get Revenge
Men have been known to be silent about things, and they plan revenge in their hearts when they are hurt. Only a few of them truly forgive you.
If you’ve cheated on him or treated him badly before, it could be why he’s hurting you now.
Most men can pretend to forgive you, but their actions would tell otherwise.
If there’s something you’ve done to hurt him before, he might be hurting you emotionally as a way of revenge.
6. He Has Mental Health Issues
A guy that has mental health issues like depression and anti-social disorder might not even be in control of his emotions.
He might say and do certain things to hurt you he didn’t mean.
If you notice your boyfriend has been battling issues like anxiety and depression, it might be the reason why he keeps hurting you emotionally.
It’s not easy to be in a relationship with a guy whose emotions are unstable.
7. He Doesn’t Love You
It’s possible he doesn’t love you and only wanted something from you; now he’s got it.
He might be a player who dumps women at will.
Most players won’t tell you it’s over. They want to keep you around to satisfy their needs, but their actions often hurt you emotionally.
If you notice your boyfriend doesn’t put effort into the relationship anymore or it’s now one-sided with you doing most of the work,
That’s proof he doesn’t love you, and he’s just using you for his interest.
My Boyfriend Hurt Me Emotionally: How To Handle The Situation
8. Let Him Know He’s Hurting You
Maybe he doesn’t know he’s hurting you until you tell him.
It could be you’ve been silent, and he feels you are okay with it.
Sit him down and tell him all the things he has been doing that hurt you.
If your boyfriend loves you, he will apologize for his mistakes and do better, but if he’s already tired of you, he will do worse.
Communication is the bedrock of every successful relationship. If you haven’t told him how his actions hurt you, he might not know.
Telling him about it would help you know if his actions are deliberate
9. Build Your Self-Worth
If you are with a guy who hurts you emotionally, it will affect your self-worth.
You begin to criticize yourself and start believing you are not good enough.
You must build your self-worth and tell yourself you deserve the best.
Such a mindset would help you walk away if he keeps treating you like trash and doesn’t accord you the respect you deserve.
Build your self-esteem by hanging out with people who see your value, reading books and gaining more exposure.
Don’t settle for a guy who hurts you constantly because you think you can’t find another guy.
You need someone who respects you; if your boyfriend doesn’t, the relationship is not worth it.
10. Practice Forgiveness
Whether you decide to stay with him or not, try and forgive him for hurting you because, without forgiveness, there’s no healing
If you decide to quit because he refused to change and treat you better, take time to heal from your past hurt.
Give yourself time to heal from the anger and bitterness in your heart so you don’t make another guy pay for your ex’s mistakes.
Forgiveness is critical if you want to enjoy your next relationship.
11. Sign Up For Counselling
If you can’t get past the hurt of your boyfriend (now ex),
Then you should sign up for counselling and let a professional therapist help you work on the hurt and bitterness you might be feeling in your heart.
Counselling would help set the foundation for your healing journey and give you the confidence to set firm boundaries in your next relationship.
Frequently Asked Questions
What To Do When Your Boyfriend Hurts You Emotionally
If your boyfriend hurt you emotionally, there are a few things you can do, and they are listed below:
Talk to him about it
Set solid boundaries
Lean on friends and family for emotional support
Break up with him and find someone else.
How Do I Get My Boyfriend To Understand He Hurt Me?
Your boyfriend might say he didn’t hurt you, but he knows he did.
You can’t make him see the hurt if he doesn’t want to.
It’s best to forgive him whether he apologizes or not.
You should end the relationship if he keeps hurting you and denying it.
Why Do I Still Love Him Even Though He Hurts Me?
You have low self-esteem
You believe he would change
You are afraid you might not find someone else
There’s something you get from him
You are afraid to be single
You have a kid with him
You’ve been together for a long time.