My boyfriend makes me feel insecure, and I don’t know what to do; this article is for you.
But first, let me share a true life story of a friend.
Why is John treating me this way? She sobbed
John is doing everything possible to make me feel insecure and worthless
He’s always bragging about how hot he is and how ladies flock around him.
To him, he’s the most in-demand guy on the planet.
When I try to talk about my feelings, he threatens me with a breakup.
Sometimes I feel not good enough for him.
Those were the words Anita said as she shared the details of her relationship with John.
She and John had been together for three years, he was great at the beginning,
But a few months into the relationship, John began to act like he was doing Anita a favor by being in the relationship.
He always tried to mock her feelings and kept hanging out with many ladies in compromising situations.
My Boyfriend Makes Me Feel Insecure: Why He Acts That Way
1. He’s Insecure And Has Low Self-Esteem
It’s ironic; insecure guys would try everything they can to make you feel insecure.
Even if he acts like a confident guy, that doesn’t mean it’s true.
If he’s always trying to make you feel like you are worthless or not good enough for him, that’s how he feels within himself.
Some guys often try to act strong even though they have low self-esteem.
The effect is that they try to put their insecurities on you.
If he’s threatening you with a breakup or acting like he’s the hottest guy in town but trying to “manage you”, he has low self-esteem.
Guys with low self-esteem magnify attention.
If a girl smiles at him, he feels good about himself and quickly announces that he’s every woman’s dream.
These attitudes are signs of a guy with low self-esteem who is trying his best to make you insecure and stay with him.
2. He Has A Terrible Experience With Women
A guy with negative experiences with women can also try to make you feel insecure.
If your boyfriend has been heartbroken, he may be trying to protect himself in the relationship.
Does he have trust issues? Does he monitor your phone or get angry anytime he sees you talking with a guy?
Does he ask you constantly if you have someone else so he can leave?
Does he tell you he doesn’t want to stress himself for love?
Does he say he doesn’t trust women?
If he does any or all of these, he’s afraid because of his negative experience with women.
He’s trying to protect himself from hurt without knowing he’s making you insecure.
3. He Doesn’t Live Nearby
If your boyfriend lives far away, it could also be the reason he’s making you feel insecure.
Maybe you called him and heard another woman’s voice in the background and panicked.
The truth is long distance relationship is not easy, and your boyfriend can easily make you feel insecure with the slightest action.
You would feel insecure if he’s constantly taking pictures with ladies in his location and always on outings with other girls.
4. You Have Self-Esteem Issues
Maybe he’s not the one making you feel insecure, but you are the one who hasn’t dealt with your Insecurities.
You might still be holding on to the hurt from your past relationship where your ex cheated on you and emotionally abused you.
Maybe you come from a home where your parents made you insecure when you were growing up.
It’s essential to dig deep to find out the root cause of your insecurities to avoid blaming your boyfriend, who might be innocent.
My Boyfriend Makes Me Feel Insecure: What To Do About It
5. Talk To Him About Your Feelings
You might think he’s aware you are feeling insecure, but you won’t know until you talk to him about it and hear his response.
Let him know he’s making you feel insecure by his actions by having lots of female friends or hanging out with his ex.
Whatever he does that makes you feel insecure, tell him.
Then observe his response and actions; if he truly loves you, he will become more aware of his actions and do his best to help you overcome your insecurities.
But if he lashes out at you for telling him and uses derogatory words like “grow up and stop being childish.”
You should know it’s time to quit the relationship and look for someone willing to make you happy and help you overcome your insecurities.
Find Out The Root Cause Of Your Insecurity
there’s a chance your insecurity is from you.
You won’t know until you go on a journey to find out why you feel insecure.
Sign up for therapy, and if your boyfriend agrees, go to the therapy session with him and tell the therapist everything that’s been going on.
You must take therapy seriously because it could help you unravel the root cause of your insecurity, and when you know it, you can quickly deal with it.
Work On Your Self-Image
The truth is nobody can make you feel insecure without your permission,
And that’s why you should have a healthy self-image before entering a relationship.
If you are scared that your boyfriend is too cute and you might lose him one day to another lady who is good enough for him, it means you have to work on your self-image.
Many ladies had destroyed their relationships by constantly accusing their boyfriend of cheating even when he was not cheating.
Work on your self-worth and tell yourself you are enough for any man.
You don’t need to become what you are not to keep your boyfriend.
He fell in love with the real you; don’t let insecurities make you change yourself.
Frequently Asked Questions
What Should I Do If My Boyfriend Makes Me Feel Insecure?
Love Yourself: the truth is nothing is as vital as self-love. It’s essential that you love and value yourself.
Relying on your boyfriend as the only source to boost your self-confidence is dangerous.
He can use it to manipulate you to get whatever he wants.
Love yourself and be extremely happy for who you are. If your boyfriend doesn’t like you that way, there’s someone who will.
Work on your self-esteem: Low self-esteem would make you tolerate a guy who makes you feel like trash.
It’s also impossible he’s not the one causing it; you are the insecure one.
That’s why you should upgrade yourself and work to improve your self-esteem.
Improving your self-esteem will help you know if it’s your boyfriend that’s making you feel insecure or if you are the one doing it yourself.
Let out how you feel: you should tell your boyfriend how you feel to see his reaction.
His response will go a long way to determine if he’s the one making you insecure or if you are the one feeling unsure about yourself.
Take time to have an honest conversation and tell how you feel.
It would be best if you didn’t try to hide anything.
Observe his body language to know if he’s intentionally making you insecure or not.
Communicate your expectations: clearly tell your boyfriend what you want and what you won’t tolerate anymore.
If he has many female friends causing tension in the relationship, you should request he put some boundaries with them.
If he’s always chatting with his ex, he should also put a boundary on that.
Tell him what makes you insecure and what you want him to do about it.
My Boyfriend Unintentionally Makes Me Feel Insecure
It would help if you told him how you feel and worked on your self-image.
Maybe he doesn’t know his actions make you feel insecure.
If you are the one feeling insecure due to your experience in life, then you should go to therapy.
My Boyfriend Makes Me Feel Insecure About My Body
It would help if you talked to him; maybe he’s unaware or doesn’t know his actions are hurting.
If he continues to act that way even after you’ve communicated your feelings, you should walk away.
You deserve to be in a relationship where your boyfriend appreciates you just the way you are and not trying to make you insecure.