Most men don’t like it when a woman complains too much; it just drives them crazy.
But you need to realize that when a man says you complain too much, that’s what he has observed.
You might not believe or agree you complain too much, and if you don’t work on it quickly, he will start resenting you.
In this article, I will share the possible reasons why your boyfriend thinks you complain too much and what you can do to fix it before it ruins your relationship.
My Boyfriend Says I Complain Too Much: Why?
1. You Nag Him
Most men Hate nagging. It freaks them out.
Nagging a man can easily make him abusive because he’s trying to make you stop.
Most men see complaining as nagging, which can make them tired and start thinking about how to exit the relationship.
2. His Personality Is Different
If you’re dating an introvert, anything you say can easily be considered complaining.
That’s because introverts hardly talk; he can see it as complaining if you talk a lot.
Your boyfriend might say you complain too much based on how you handle life situations.
He might be the optimistic person who believes everything will get better, while you, on the other hand, don’t think that way.
3. He’s Dealing With Personal Challenges
When some guys are dealing with life challenges, they get angry easily.
And when you try to express your feelings, they might say you complain too much.
When most men are going through challenges, they want to be alone or in an environment with little discussion.
But if you’re someone who loves to discuss your problems with him, such discussion can get him agitated.
4. You Have Compatibility Issues
If your boyfriend has been saying you complain too much for a long time, it could mean you’re incompatible.
Maybe you’re not his kind of woman due to your personality.
We often want to force a relationship with someone we are incompatible with.
He might see your communication style as complaining while you might just be expressing yourself.
If the relationship is filled with constant misunderstandings and arguments, compatibility might be the cause.
5. You Keep Bringing Past Issues
Most men don’t like it when a woman brings up past issues that have already been resolved.
It could make him say you complain too much, especially when you use the past to haunt him.
Such behavior frustrates men and makes them start thinking of exiting the relationship.
6. He’s Trying To Manipulate You
Sometimes, your boyfriend saying you complain too much might be a way of manipulating you to stop talking about your feelings.
He might call it complaining when you’re just trying to express yourself.
It could be he doesn’t give you attention anymore, or you don’t feel heard in the relationship, And you’re trying to talk to him about it.
A Lot of men use that trick to silence their women.
If your boyfriend says you complain too much anytime you talk about your needs, he could be trying to manipulate you.
My Boyfriend Says I Complain Too Much: How To Handle The Situation
7. Seek Understanding
The first thing to do is to ask him why he feels that way about you.
It’s important you pay attention to his reasons and take them seriously.
Maybe you keep mentioning the past, or you nag him often.
You have to make him believe you care enough to work on your attitude that affects him.
8. Acknowledge His Feelings
After you’ve listened to his reasons, try not to discard his opinion as if it doesn’t matter. Don’t be defensive and accuse him of provoking you.
Instead, admit you didn’t know you were doing something like that, and if your behavior has hurt him in the past, apologize to him.
Acknowledging his feelings and apologizing to him for your mistake will make it easy for him to be patient as you work on it.
9. Work On Yourself
Try and start working on yourself to avoid sabotaging the relationship.
Men hardly talk; they only do when they love you.
Work on yourself and ask your boyfriend for feedback to be sure you’re improving.
If you feel you can’t do it alone, you can seek the help of a professional like a therapist to help you.
10. Ask Other People About It
You might have heard from your boyfriend that you complain too much, but try to ask other people.
Ask your close family members and friends if you complain too much.
Just to be sure your boyfriend isn’t trying to manipulate you.
If your boyfriend’s observations were true, your close friends and family would have experienced it.
Frequently Asked Questions
My Boyfriend Broke Up With Me Because I Complain Too Much. What Should I Do?
If your boyfriend broke up with you because you complained too much, you can do the following:
Work on yourself: you will need to work on your attitude.
Men see complaining and nagging as the same, and they hate it.
A woman who complains too much can easily drive her man crazy, which could make him aggressive.
If it’s difficult to stop the habit, you can sign up for therapy.
Be patient: the habit won’t leave you overnight. You have to be patient and keep working on it.
Resist the temptation to complain about anything.
If you like to nag about an issue for a long time, please stop.
Apologize to him: if you believe your boyfriend still loves you and the relationship still has a chance, you can apologize.
Let him know the steps you’ve taken to ensure you stop the habit of complaining.
What Does It Mean When Your Boyfriend Says You Complain Too Much?
If your boyfriend says you complain too much, it could mean the following:
You nag him often
You hold on to issues for a long time
You criticize him for making mistakes
You talk too much
Why Does My Boyfriend Say I’m Complaining When I Tell Him How I Feel?
If your boyfriend says you complain while you’re trying to communicate your feelings, it means the following:
He doesn’t understand you
You’re bringing up the conversation the wrong way.
He’s trying to silence you.
You keep repeating the issue without a solution
He doesn’t really love you