Trust is the foundation of every healthy relationship; without it, love can quickly lose its taste.
If your boyfriend doesn’t trust you, then you will get into a fight with him often.
He would want to know who’s calling you; he would read your chats without permission.
If you talk to another guy, he will get angry and accuse you of cheating.
You become a prisoner in your relationship, and that’s not nice.
In this article, I will share the possible reasons why your boyfriend doesn’t trust me.
If you’re ready, let’s dive in.
My Boyfriend Doesn’t Trust Me: Why He Acts That Way
1. Past Betrayal Or Experience
Your boyfriend might not trust you because of past relationship experiences.
He might have trust issues due to his ex that cheated on him.
I was a victim of relationship betrayal in the past.
My girlfriend cheated on me with a guy she said was just a friend.
It took a long time for me to get over the pain of betrayal and to trust again when I started a new relationship.
The truth is our experience in life often shapes our actions.
His experience might be why he’s finding it difficult to trust you.
Secondly, he could have trust issues if you cheated on him in the past.
Men hardly forget cheating. It keeps replaying in their mind for a long time.
2. You’re Acting Suspicious
Your boyfriend might not trust you because you keep acting suspicious.
Maybe you hide your phone from him or receive certain calls away from him.
He will notice and think you’re hiding something even if you’re not.
You might have a lot of male friends that keep texting and calling you, making your boyfriend suspect you’re cheating.
3. Unresolved Conflicts And Issues
There may be an unresolved conflict that’s making him insecure.
He might have seen something on your phone that triggered his suspicion, or he confronted you about something and wasn’t satisfied with your answer.
If there’s any unresolved conflict about your loyalty to the relationship, it could be why he doesn’t trust you.
4. Insecurity And Low Self-Esteem
A guy who is insecure or has low self-esteem would find it difficult to trust you.
There are many reasons why a guy might have low self-esteem or feel insecure such as he was betrayed in the past,
Grew up with abusive parents, poor performance at his job etc.
A guy that has low self-esteem will be threatened if you’re talking to another guy.
He would become possessive and even violent because he doesn’t want you to leave the relationship.
A possessive guy wants to know where you are every minute; he would call you severally if you don’t pick up his calls immediately.
When you pick up the call, he will start accusing you of cheating and calling you names.
5. External Influences
His close friends might be the ones telling him you’re cheating.
Maybe they saw you going somewhere and assumed you were cheating.
Sometimes people can sow the wrong thoughts in your man’s heart that would make him start acting weird towards you.
I have a friend that people told him negative things about his girlfriend.
He became suspicious and possessive, which made them fight daily until the relationship ended.
What Should I Do When My Boyfriend Doesn’t Trust Me
6. Identify The Root Causes
You need to know why he doesn’t trust you.
Find out if you’ve done something that makes him not trust you or if the insecurity comes from his past relationships.
The past has a way of influencing our present mindset.
Try to understand his reasons for lack of trust.
Identifying the root cause can help you address the situation.
7. Reassure Him Of Your Commitment.
Your boyfriend might need you to reassure him of your love and loyalty to the relationship.
Let your boyfriend know that you are committed to the relationship and willing to work on building trust.
Tell him you love him and won’t ever cheat on him.
If something makes him doubt your loyalty, then clarify it.
Maybe you have many male friends, and that’s why he doesn’t trust you, then you should address it.
8. Avoid Defensiveness
It’s natural to get angry when someone doesn’t trust you but try to avoid being defensive.
Instead, approach the situation with empathy and understanding.
Acknowledge his feelings without becoming defensive or dismissive.
It’s possible what he’s saying is valid.
I remember the first time I met my ex-girlfriend’s male friend.
I immediately wasn’t comfortable with him being friends with my ex.
She dismissed it and said I didn’t need to worry about him because they were just friends.
Although I trusted her, it made me suspicious of her.
I later found out they started dating, which brought an end to our relationship.
9. Be Consistent And Reliable
Consistency and reliability are essential ingredients in building trust.
Show your boyfriend he can rely on you and that you prioritize honesty and transparency.
If you can keep matching your words with actions, then over time, he will learn to trust you.
Try not to lie to him about anything; if you’ve lied in the past, commit to honesty going forward.
Be aware it would take time for him to trust you again if you broke his trust in the past.
10. Avoid Secrets
The best way to build trust with a guy that doesn’t trust you is to be transparent and patient.
Be open about your actions and decisions. Avoid keeping secrets or hiding things, as this can further damage trust.
If you’re going somewhere, let him know and avoid situations that would make him lose trust in you.
11. Quit If Nothing Changes
You can’t continue to be in a relationship with a guy that doesn’t trust you.
If you’ve applied the strategies listed above and he still doesn’t trust you, then you should walk away.
It’s risky dating a guy that doesn’t trust you. He can become violent one day and hit you.
You will not be a heroine by staying with a guy that doesn’t trust you.
Frequently Asked Questions
What To Say To Your Boyfriend When He Says He Doesn’t Trust You?
If your boyfriend says he doesn’t trust you, then you can reply to him in the following ways:
Ask him why: you should ask why he doesn’t trust you.
Hearing such words from him can hurt, but it would hurt more if you didn’t know why.
Try not to be confrontational; instead, be calm and seek the truth from him.
Apologize to him: if you did something that broke his trust, you have to apologize and give him time to get over it.
It won’t be easy for him, but if you’re patient and make him know it’s an honest mistake, he will let it go.
How Do I Make My Boyfriend Trust Me Completely?
Be honest and transparent with him
Always communicate your feelings
Avoid keeping secrets from him
Ensure your words and action align
Try not to betray his trust.
My Boyfriend Doesn’t Trust Me Because I Lied . What Should I Do?
It won’t be easy for your boyfriend to trust you again after you broke his trust.
It might be difficult for him to let it go depending on what you lied about.
He might not trust you again if you cheated on him and lied about it.
You have to give him time to heal; he might decide to give you a second chance to make things right.