Hearing your boyfriend calling you fat can hurt your self-esteem and make you feel bad about yourself.
Most guys initially call you fat jokingly but become serious over time.
Sometimes, they call you demeaning and hurtful names that will break you, Names such as baby whale or polar bear just to hurt your feelings.
When your boyfriend calls you fat, it will make you insecure about yourself.
You will look in the mirror daily to check if you’re getting fat
You might even be scared to eat in his presence because you fear criticism.
My boyfriend called me fat; in this article you would discover why and what to do about it.
Why Does My Boyfriend Call Me Fat?
1. He’s Trying To Demean You
Your boyfriend might call you fat because he wants to demean you and make you feel not good enough.
Sometimes, a guy calling you fat is a manipulative technique to make you stay with him.
He would make you believe no other guy wants you because of your size.
If your boyfriend is a narcissist, he will attack your self-esteem so you won’t leave him.
You might have an attractive personality, and he’s scared another guy would be interested in you.
It’s also possible he called you fat because he’s resenting you for something you did to him.
Some guys can say anything when they’re in a bad mood.
2. He’s Insecure
Your boyfriend might be insecure, which is why he called you fat.
He might have low self-esteem; hence, he’s trying to make you feel bad about yourself.
You might be more successful than him, making him jealous.
When someone is jealous of you, they would do anything to bring down your self-confidence.
Your boyfriend might be the one who thinks very low of himself, and he’s trying to project the same thinking on you.
An insecure guy is always looking for how to hurt you.
3. Pressure From External Influences
His friends and family might have told him you’re fat, and he should tell you.
He might have seen thin girls on social media, and he’s trying to compare them to you.
My friend’s boyfriend gave her an ultimatum to become a size 12 within 90 days.
That’s a crazy request, especially when he met her as a size 16.
Your boyfriend might have heard his family calling you fat behind your back.
External influences, if not handled with care, can cause problems in a relationship.
4. Concerned About Your Health
Your boyfriend might have said it innocently, maybe due to his concern for your health.
If your boyfriend has never called you fat or shown signs he wants you to lose weight, he might have said it out of love, Although that’s not the best way to say it.
Words like “you’re fat” can easily ruin your self-esteem.
5. He’s Insensitive
Your boyfriend might have an insensitive personality that makes him utter words without caring how it hurts.
He might be blunt when communicating.
He doesn’t care about people’s feelings; he says it the way it is.
Some people are like that. They don’t know how to be diplomatic when communicating their feelings.
6. He’s Tired Of The Relationship
Sometimes, when a guy is tired of a relationship, he starts looking for an excuse to quit.
Your boyfriend might already be thinking of a breakup.
He might call you fat to use that as his reason for ending the relationship.
If your boyfriend has been acting weird recently and doesn’t give you the needed attention, it might mean he’s tired of the relationship.
You might have been together for a long time, and he doesn’t know how to tell you it’s over; hence, he uses your weight as an excuse.
7. Unhealthy Relationship Dynamics
Sometimes, your boyfriend calling you fat is a sign the relationship is about to become toxic.
Calling you fat might be the beginning of his verbal abuse towards you.
From calling you fat, he might start to control what you eat and what you wear. Within a short time, the relationship can become very unhealthy.
What To Do When Your Boyfriend Calls You Fat
8. Take Time To Process Your Emotions
It’s natural to feel hurt, angry, or upset when someone makes hurtful comments about your appearance. Take some time to process your feelings.
You have to be in the right frame of mind before you confront him and demand an explanation.
9. Communicate Your Feelings
Once you’re ready, have an open and honest conversation with your boyfriend.
Express how his comment made you feel without attacking or blaming him. Use “I” statements to describe your emotions, such as “I felt hurt when you called me fat.”
Tell him what he said affected you.
He will apologize if he thought it was a joke but didn’t know it would hurt you.
But if your boyfriend said it deliberately, he would be defensive and tell you he won’t apologize for stating the obvious.
10. Set Firm Boundaries
Let your boyfriend know that hurtful comments are not acceptable in the relationship.
Emphasize the importance of mutual respect and kindness in your interactions.
Tell him you would take drastic action the next time he calls you fat.
Most women tolerate things like these, not knowing it would get worse if you don’t set boundaries.
You need to tell him what will happen the next time he calls you fat and mean it.
11. Discuss Solutions
If the comment was made out of genuine concern for your health or well-being, discuss how you can support each other in making positive lifestyle changes.
However, this should be done in a supportive and non-judgmental manner.
If you believe what he said is true and comes from a place of love, you can sign up for a weight loss program.
If you don’t exercise before or eat junk food, it’s time to change to a healthy lifestyle.
12. Focus On Building Your Self-Confidence
Your boyfriend calling you fat can affect your self-image.
That’s why it’s important to keep building your self-confidence.
And not allow a guy or your size to define who you are.
Many ladies have accepted negative comments from their boyfriends as the truth and started seeing themselves that way.
They feel they’re not good enough and nobody would want them because of their size.
Protect your self-confidence at all costs. It would help you not tolerate BS in the name of love.
13. Evaluate The Relationship
After some time, assess whether your boyfriend’s actions and attitude toward you align with a healthy and loving relationship.
If hurtful comments continue or there are other signs of disrespect or emotional abuse, you have to quit because you deserve better.
There are a lot of men who would want you for a committed relationship if only you would let the abusive boyfriend go.
Frequently Asked Questions
Is It Normal For My Boyfriend To Call Me Fat?
Although some guys can call their girlfriends fat, a loving and sensitive guy won’t say what will negatively affect your self-esteem.
It’s not normal for your boyfriend to call you fat unless he wants to make you feel unworthy of him.
Is It OK For My Boyfriend To Comment On My Weight?
It depends on the situation.
If your boyfriend comments on your weight based on genuine concern for your health, then it’s okay.
But if it’s for his desire to have a hot and sexy girlfriend that everyone would admire, then it’s not okay.
My Boyfriend Called Me Fat. What Does It Mean?
If your boyfriend calls you fat, then it could mean any of the following:
He’s no longer attracted to you
He’s trying to destroy your self-esteem
He’s worried about your health
He’s resents you
He’s tired of the relationship