I feel like a burden to my boyfriend if you are in such situation this article is for you.
Let me share my story with you.
In October 2017, I met a nice and lovely woman.
She had a lot of challenges in life when I met her, but I was determined to help her get better.
After about one year of dating, she started feeling uncomfortable asking me for help when needed.
The challenges she had encountered in life dealt with her self-esteem,
She felt I was doing too much and didn’t know how she would repay me, and I wasn’t thinking about repayment.
She feared investing emotionally in the relationship because she felt I would one day leave her for being a burden.
Her thinking did hurt me.
Eventually, we broke up, not because she was a burden but because her negative thinking affected the relationship.
If you are in a relationship where you are thinking you are a burden to your boyfriend, this article is for you.
I would share the possible reasons why you feel that way and what you can do to handle the situation. If you are ready, let’s dive in.
Why Do I Feel Like A Burden To My Boyfriend?
1. Financial Struggles
Having financial struggles is one of the biggest reasons that can make you feel like a burden.
If your boyfriend has been helping you financially a lot, you will soon start feeling like a burden.
My ex-girlfriend was like that; when we met, she didn’t have much financially, but I was determined to help her, which made her feel like a burden.
At one point, she felt she was in the relationship for financial gain. To her, it was like she was using me.
I understand how difficult it is to always go to your boyfriend whenever you have a financial need. It could make you feel like a burden.
You might think you are a burden to him, and he doesn’t see you that way.
2. Physical Limitation
If you have a physical disability or a chronic illness that makes you visit the hospital regularly, it might make you feel like a burden.
Maybe your boyfriend accompanies you to the hospital whenever you have an appointment, and you are beginning to feel you are stressing him.
He might not have complained, but you feel he’s complaining in his mind and might leave you soon.
3. Mental Health Issues
If you have issues with your mental health, such as anxiety and depression,
You might start feeling like a burden because of what your boyfriend has endured with you.
Anxiety and depression make you feel you don’t deserve anything good and you are a burden to those who love you.
You start to feel everyone thinks negatively about you, including your boyfriend.
Mental health issues can make you cold and distant from your boyfriend because you feel like a burden to him.
4. You Have Low Self-Esteem
When you have low self-esteem, you would always feel not good enough despite the love he showers you.
You would keep comparing yourself with other girls and think you are a burden that doesn’t deserve him.
Many factors can result in low self-esteem, such as negative childhood experiences, poor academic performance, failed relationships etc.
If you have low self-esteem, you will never feel adequate for your boyfriend. You will always feel you are a burden to him.
If you call him or text him and he doesn’t respond would think, “, Oh, it’s like I am now a burden.”
When you think you are a burden, you will find it hard to ask him for assistance when you need it.
Feeling this way would affect your ability to communicate with him because there are things you won’t want to talk about.
5. Past Experience
If you are a girl who grew up with people always making you feel like a burden, it could have affected your mindset.
If your parents treated you like a burden and made you feel unwanted as a child, it could be what’s affecting you now.
Maybe you stayed with people who were not your parents, and they acted like you were a burden.
If people or the guy you dated in the past have made you feel like a burden, it might trigger the feeling that you are a burden.
6. Imbalance In The Relationship
You may be the one receiving in the relationship and not giving anything in return which can make the relationship seem one-sided.
He does everything for you and makes you happy, he’s always there for you whenever you need him,
But you are wondering what you’ve offered him in the relationship.
You might feel you always get all the love and support, and your boyfriend gets nothing in return.
Maybe you met him at a very low point in your life, and you’ve put a lot of your emotional struggles on him.
I Feel Like A Burden To My Boyfriend: How To Handle The Situation
7. Acknowledge Your Feelings
The first step in handling the situation is to ask yourself why you feel like a burden to your boyfriend.
If you are honest, you can find out why you feel that way.
After you’ve found out what’s making you feel like a burden, communicate it with your boyfriend and tell him you’ve been feeling that way for a while.
Maybe he doesn’t see you that way, and you are overthinking it.
He might be surprised you think you are a burden to him when he has never thought of you that way.
8. Take More Responsibility
Maybe your boyfriend helps you financially, and you feel like a burden because of it.
You can take more responsibility for your finances by getting a job, and if you already have one, you can start an online side hustle.
Be willing to work on yourself and focus on personal development.
If you feel he’s doing too much for you, find the one you can do yourself.
9. Work On Your Self-Esteem
It’s possible you feel like a burden because of low self-esteem. In that case, you have to work on your self-esteem.
Low self-esteem won’t disappear in a day. You have to keep working on yourself by reading books, taking courses, and improving your well-being.
You should let your boyfriend know how you feel because he can help boost your self-esteem by reminding you that you are a blessing, not a burden.
If you don’t work on your self-esteem, you might destroy the relationship with your constant thoughts of being a burden to your boyfriend.
10. Seek Support
You can sign up for therapy to help you get over your negative thoughts.
Therapy would help you get to the root of the problem, making it easy to fix.
Be honest with the therapist and give sincere reasons why you feel like a burden to your boyfriend.
You can also get support from family and friends by sharing your challenges with them.
Frequently Asked Questions
How Do I Stop Feeling Like A Burden To My Boyfriend
Find the root cause of your feeling
Focus on personal development
Refuse to entertain negative thoughts
Cut ties with toxic friends
I Feel Like A Burden To My Boyfriend. Should I Tell Him
Yes. You should tell him about it and hear what he has to say.
His words might help boost your confidence and make you realize you’re thinking wrongly.
I Feel Like A Boyfriend To My Boyfriend. Is It Because I Am Broke?
Most likely, if you’re not contributing financially to the relationship and your boyfriend is the only one handling all the financial expenses, it can make you feel like a burden.
If he’s always the one doing things for you and you’ve been unable to do anything for him in return, it can trigger that feeling.